There was a guy and a girl naked in bed, sleeping together. When they woke up they didn't remember the last 72 hours and wanted some questions answered, including Where am I? Who are you? What year is it? What's my name?

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Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

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Ill never forget the last phone conversation i had with my Jewish friend before he died due to the 9/11 incident. Friend:owejpq3jhp3qjopiqwejhriopjhaiophfioashiohwih13ioh3f2893hoiqehefioahfioahisdpahdfajdfopasjiopdfajdfopsajradalkdjakldja;hdfkl;adhlpa;dhfakl;dhkladhkadhlkhdjklahdjkgsdjkgbdqwgy3bi3grqbhgjkasjkdkasjdgjkadgskajgdkajdsgjkasgdad

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Why'd the bird in Ohio fall out of its nest? There was a squirrel that was eaten by a large eagle. The eagle then flew to Ohio and died. Then, a large dog grabbed the Eagles corpse and brought it to his owner. The owner then decided to have it for dinner. Inside the eagle, he found the squirrels bones. He put the bones in a catapult, and sent them flying. The bones hit a car and the car slipped off the road and into a river. Then, a whale put the car on its back and swam to the shore. At the shore, the whale got stranded and sadly died. Crabs surrounded the whale and ate it. One crab then ran away and up a tree. It found a stapler and a rubber dinosaur mask and gave it to a chipmunk. The chipmunk climbed up the tree, stapled nuts into the birds eyes and stapled the rubber dinosaur mask to its face, the bird got scared, and then all of the sudden the chipmunk stapled itself to the birds back. The birds family then came and shoved the two out of the tree because they hated chipmunks, and their son Timmy the bird was a disappointment. The bird and the chipmunk fell and died. That is why the bird fell.

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Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

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How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

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7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road. Because roads were not invented then dumbass.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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