Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

Why do midgets wear condoms? To avoid unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

there are 2 men standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is called Peter

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson. I spelled "red" wrong.

Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

A bartender sees Jesus Christ, George Washington, and Adolf Hitler walk into his bar. The bartender is drunk.

why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

What did the scarf say to the hat? Nothing, a scarf can't talk.

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

A Black and a Mexican are in the back of a car, they are carpooling to save money on gas.

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

whats hard long and has cum in it cucumber

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What is funnier than the funniest thing in the world? Something funnier than the world!

Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...