What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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