What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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Q. Why is me question not funny? A. Because there is no point to it.

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

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Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

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Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

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What's better than 24-year-olds? Twenty 4-year-olds.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

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Why is jordan goldstein a fag cause he doesnt like my videos

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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Why did everyone at school think that Susan was so hot? They set her on fire.

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why cant fat people walk because they are fat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

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Your moms so ugly, that when i took her out to eat for dinner we built an everlasting relationship. Thats why you call me dad.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven. Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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