What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

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why are anti-jokes so funny? Because you are expecting them to encompass one idea of irony, but instead sometimes give a logical explanation to the question.

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What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

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You Mom is so ugly, It makes sense why you always have that look on your face!

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: What do you call an anti-joke? A: An anti-joke

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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How did the baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken

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What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

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Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

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Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

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Why did the cat die? To get to the other side

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Did you know that if you say "gullible" slowy, it still sounds like you're saying "gullible."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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