What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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What starts with a 's' and ends in 'ex'? Sex -XH

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

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A Catholic priest has the choice between spending an hour with a young girl or a young boy. Which does he choose? Neither because that's illegal and completely immoral for a priest.

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What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

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oh whatever donald trump's not going to be president. stop pretending he is

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An asian man and a black man were having a conversation. The asian man sneezed. The black man got SARS and he died shortly after.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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what did batman say to robyn before he got in the car?... "get in the car"

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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A skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a mug of beer and a washcloth.

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Knock knock whose there nobody you have no friends remember

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

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how do you get an A in a class? idk never got on.

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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Why was Armando unable to be found by his friend Ashley ? A: They both were murdered 7 years ago, and bodies are unable to do anything if they lost their soul that was with that body.

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Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

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Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

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Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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