A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my legs Doctor: It's because you're blind son

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What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

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Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Are you Jamaican? Because your dreadlocked hair is an iconic symbol of one who would be from the country of Jamaica.

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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To be, or not to be. That is not the question. The question is, what time is it?

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How do you become a dragon ball super saiyan? You sit there and scream like you are giving birth for three minuets

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this is madness! Madness? no, nevah... THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!! NO, THIS IS PATRICK!!!

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What did the Momma Kangaroo say when she couldnt find her baby?

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whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

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why didnt little timmy finish his test he was eaten by a muslim rhino... .

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Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No?

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A rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

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What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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