What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

Where does a jew with ADD go ? A concentration camp

Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

A man died.

How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

What did john say to dave when his grandfather died ?

How did the blind man escape the mugger? He ran into a bus.

why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

whats worse than not being able to hear? not being able to breath fvd n avt were here

knock knock who's there? I'm here.

Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

whats the worst part about being a black jew your black and jewish

Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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