Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He was dead. Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He got hit by the first one. Why did the third koala fall off the tree? He thought it was a game so he joined in.

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What did the white guy say when a black man punched him? Ow, i am sueing for assault. that is a crime

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Q:Whats worst then finding a worm in your apple? A:Getting raped in the ass.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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what you get time to go with? - a clock

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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Roses are red Olives are Black come to my and will smoke some crack

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

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The doctor woke up and the hooker he screwed told him she had the clap and he said thats the least of your problms bitch you have aids

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If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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Indians

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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