- Anti Joke

two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

Knock Knock Opens door Hi John, you got here right on time!

Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

What is a jew in space? Dead

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

Knock Knock Opens door Hi John, you got here right on time!

Women

Mitt Romney

Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

What is a jew in space? Dead

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

Women

Mitt Romney

Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Knock Knock Opens door Hi John, you got here right on time!