"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

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Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

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What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

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A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

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Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

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Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

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A racist indian (from india) walks into a bar (in india). A catholic priest walks into the same bar. The bar says 'moo'. The bar is a shape-shifting cow.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

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Your eye color is very unique.

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In Soviet Russia, the government kills with famine and genocide.

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your mom

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In Soviet Russia its very cold

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minorities

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What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

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Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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