What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

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A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

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Yo mama is so fat , she died of a heart condition

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Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

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A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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The WPGA tour

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A penis walks into a bar..

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Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

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How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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Knock Knock ............... No one's home.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

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A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society.

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Why couldn't little Suzie snap her fingers? Her stepfather cut off her fingers after becoming a drunk and leaving her family.

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why do they sparkle?!?!?!?!

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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Knock Knock Who's there? ........

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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