Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

There was once a boy who ate fire. He died of severe burns.

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

Q. Which is longer ... a rope ?

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

What Mistake Do Ghosts make? None ghosts dont exist..

My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

How many people of a certain demographic does it take to change a light bulb? x+1 (x >0), 1 person to change the lightbulb and x to behave in a manner consistent with the established stereotype of said demographic.

whats yellow after cani...nathan

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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