I completely thought you where bullshitting me, how come I never noticed before? How and why?

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A man walks into a sofa. BANG

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When Chuck Norris is in a puddle, he doesnt get wet....he wears rainboots.

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A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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whats wooden and hard a wooden floor

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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Who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? The same Griffin Kid.

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

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Patient: Doctor, it hurts when I run, I might have arthritis. Doctor: Let me check.... 5 minutes later... Doctor: It turs out you have 3 bullets in your legs. Patient: Ohhh, I get it now.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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how do you make a plumber cry A: kill his family

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If life gives you lemons, squeeze it in life' s eyes.

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

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Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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Why does life hand you lemons? Because it sucks enough, so it wants you to have some.

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

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What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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