What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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A man penetrates another man.

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roses are red so is ur face dont look at me like im a crazy bitch

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

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were did the gay guy go nowere because it was raining outside

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

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Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

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"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet, so he/she can put it down.

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What do you call two black men sitting on the porch? Craig and Smokey

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there could be several reasons. The sight of another chicken, its wondering imagination, but because chickens cannot speak, therefore, can never know the true answer.

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The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returns and says, "My friend does not have a pulse, so I stand by my prior assumption that he is dead."

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roses are red violets are too im bleeding

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What does 1 black person on the moon mean? A problem. What do 2 black people on the moon mean? A problem. What does every black person on the world on the moon mean? It's still a problem.

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roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you *bam* *bam**bam*

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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a Gay Man Walks Into A Bar And See's its Only Women In There, He Screams And Leaves

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How many black babies fit in a garbage can? It depends on the capacity of the garbage can.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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