What was the last song those aboard the Titanic sang? "Staying alive"

It's yellow and when you press the button, it becomes red... A baby chicken in a blender

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

A chicken crosses the road... Gets fined for jaywalking.

Q:What do you do when you see a talking raccoon A:Quit the LSD

what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

no

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

Knock knock Who's there Police, there's been an accident Oh really? Know i'm actually a serial rapist and i have a gun so open up

What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

What did the penis say to the vagina? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

Christianity.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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