Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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seek beauty

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a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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In Soviet Russia, everything you do will have an equal and opposite effect, for the laws of physics still apply in every part of the world. No matter where you are.

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How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

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2 black people and a mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The black person because they decided it would save gas if they all carpooled to their job.

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Once a upon of time, cow said chicken go cluck. Years later, mustard was like a ketchup. I said it was good. Oh yea baby. It was a good day.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I hi Jacked your car And killed your family

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They see me rollin' They hatin' Patrolin they try to catch write a joke Try to catch me write a joke Try to catch me write a joke (tootle loo, I see you ;)

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How do you make a plumber cry? You steal his princess

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Knock knock. Who's there? A bad joke.

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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If Sally has 4 apples and Dan has 3 apples, how many apples do they have together? Red, because ducks have 2 legs.

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HURT

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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What do astronauts and Wayne Rooney have in common? I don't know. Ok.

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops