Roses are red Violets are blue Theres a crazy ass alpaca ready to take a shit on you

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What do watermelons taste like? Sand.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas A bike.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Why shouldn't gingers smoke before they are 3? Because they have souls and still abide by the same rules!........................................................................................................................................ If you laughed at that you either don't like gingers or should be shot. And by the way... Why did Snape kill Dumbledore? Because he had to.

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Your chicken just went across the road. What does this tell you about the economy?

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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Two scuba divers are playing cards on the bottom of the ocean. One asks "have you got amy threes?" Then they both die from maintained exposure to the incredible pressure at the bottom of the sea. One left behind three children.

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What did the serial killer eat for breakfast? You.

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Why are Jews always so clean? Because they never come out of the shower.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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Why do migets laught when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

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So there's this big ass bronco right? It goes to a store and it asks Ben Roethlisberger "Do you know where I can find some girls to rape?" Ben Roethlsiberger says "In aisle 5" so the moose goes down to aisle 5 but there aint no girls!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

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So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

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A man told this joke once... it wasn't funny.

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why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

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Balls

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, the holocaust didn't actually happen, besides I hate jews

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I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

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Jesus walks on water Chuck Norris swims through land

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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