Hey! I just met you. And this may seem crazy. So here's my number: Now Get in the van.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

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What do you call a blue chair A black person

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Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

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i killed my family

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There's my tractor.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

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A American seeking into mexico

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What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

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guy walks into a bar. other guy says to him, "are you blind"? "yes", he answered.

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roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

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Why did the man have a heart attack? Because he suffered from high cholesterol and cardiovascular disease.

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How is a frog similar to a corn dog? They both have really long tongues, except for the corn dog

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When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

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Knock Knock. The doors unlocked you can come in. The two men have a nice conversation while enjoying a couple of beers and then order a pizza because they get hungry.

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Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

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What did the prostitute say to the pimp? Can I have $50? She was found three minutes later beaten to death with a purple cane, and had many imprssions of rings in her skull

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What did Adam say when he saw Eve with just a fig leaf? The recipe said three frikkin figs.what the hell am I going to do with a fig leaf, you better get back in there, and hurry because I'm double parked. I was referring to Eastend married couple Adam and Eve Turner, in case there was any confusion.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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Q: How do you tell a Jewish person that you love them? A: You tell them "I love you".

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What do you call a black man on a bike? A hard-working individual who found a steady job and earned enough money to buy a bicycle of his own which he rides to and from his job because he is healthy, doesn't like to waste money on gas, and doesn't like the pollution automobiles put into the air. By Darragh Hamilton

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops