What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

What do you call a joke with no punchline?

You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars. You both have the same amount of money.

Ya know what's funny? A joke well-told by a professional comedian.

why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

I used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot.... ya' damn racist!

what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

What amusing anecdote did the Department of Educational Dictations officer tell his coworker? There was no amusing anecdote. DED men tell no tales.

Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

Why doesn't anybody like the octopus? There anti-social creatures by nature

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

Why did the cow cross the road? Because he escaped the farm and didn't know what else to do.

A man bets that his friend can't drink five beers in a row. His friend does it and says "See, I told you I can do it!" The man replies "No, I can't see, I'm blind."

Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

Why did the fat man fall off the balcony? He didn't, I pushed him.

i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...