Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

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PENIS

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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A jew, a homosexuel and a black guy are on a plane. It crashes and they all die in horrible circumstances.

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What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

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save me from the nothing ive become

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

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Get on the boat.

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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knock knock who's there? I'm here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops