what are three short words? i a am

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you wanna hear a good anti joke?, so do i

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Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

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It's not that hard to be Dyslexic. You just have to accept it nad ovem no.

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Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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You ever hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither has she.

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What's worse than stepping on legos? Massive genocide

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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Horse.

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Casey Anthony kills a baby

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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A black man and a mexican are falling off a cliff. Who lands first? The police officer.

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How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

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So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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