A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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Dude man, I'm high...

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I would like a pint of..........beer." The bar tender asked "why the long pause?" The bear replies "I think I just had a stroke."

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

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Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

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Q: What's the difference between Bigfoot and an intelligent blonde? A: Whereas intelligent blondes are known to exist, most scientists discount the existence of Bigfoot and consider it to be a combination of folklore, misidentification, and hoax, rather than a living animal, in part because of the large numbers thought necessary to maintain a breeding population.

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

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A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

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Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

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Ey hornboy give es a SCAB

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How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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What do you call a person from China? Chinese, duh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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