- Anti Joke

YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

Q: how do u wake lady gaga up? A: you poke-poke poke her face.

What the hell are you doing?

So a woman walks into a store... There's a lamp selling for $5.99. She buys it because she thinks that's a pretty good deal.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

there once was a black man who played basketball

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

What do you call a deaf-black man that professionally generates maps of the world? A cartographer.

how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

A group of black people are arrested for murder, what do you need? A better prison.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

Why Was 6 Afraid of 7? Because 7 was a Pedophile

What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get down.

what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!