whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

An Asian person drove home safely.

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

So a guy with a machine gun walks into a bank, makes a deposite and leaves.

You idiot thats 9 letters

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

What long black and tasty? Licorice

what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

bangers and mash?

Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...