How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Your momma's so fat...

thumb_up thumb_down -79

when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

thumb_up thumb_down -91

What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

thumb_up thumb_down +44

11111

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A black guy gets arrested...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down

i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Rich merchant started build a new bigger home for his family. He bought good blueprints and hired some construction workers to build it up. It took 2 years for the house to finish. Just few days before moving in, he had an horrible nightmare where little green men set the house on fire. When he woke up, he heard the bad news. House was burned down during the night. Merchant was shocked and sad. After couple of weeks, he decided to build a new house. This time a smaller one. Again he bought blueprints and hired people to work for him. Almost a year later, the house was starting to be finished. And again he saw that nightmare of little green men burning the house down. At morning he already knew the news and started to investigate these happenings. Local police officer couldn't help him and so didn't anyone else he asked. Merchant decided to try once more to build new home. This time he had money only for a small farmhouse. Building it up last 6 months, and almost every night merchant was guarding the construction site for little green men. Farmhouse finished in time and merchant moved in. In couple weeks he started to relax and think that little green men stopped harassing him. At one night, couple of months after moving in. Merchant saw the nightmare again, and woke up in burning house. He escaped from the window and saved his wife and children. Then he ran to the village to call for help. The next morning, merchant was sitting next to his burned home and just thinking the motives for green men, what did he do in past so that green men were angry at him? Some villagers had come to watch the burned house and merchant saw something green in middle of the crowd. He slowly walked towards the crowd and saw this little man fleeing. He started to pursue this man and was pumped with adrealine. Didn't last long when merchant catched this little guy and held him in the ground to ask "Who are you? Do you have anything to do with those housefires?" The little green man was calm and relaxed as he answered "No."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops