How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you think would happen if there was a zombie apocalypse? You would just die.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Somebody else besides you: what time is it? You: what time is what? SOmebody else: ? What?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the Christian say to the Muslim? Our faiths are actually derived from the same Judeo base.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happens when you put a white shirt in the red see on a blue moon? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the boy with one arm have no friends? He was a cereal killer from Ireland.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

dry handjob

thumb_up thumb_down -11

roses are red violets are blue

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

LIKE FOR GANGNAM STYLE. DISLIKE FOR JUSTIN BIEBER LETS SEE WHO WINS

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Alex watched his grandfather tear up as he told him the terrors of the Holocaust. Apparently killing Jews is hard on people.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the black person say to the other black person? Im really white, I just want to fell what its like to be black.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why couldn't jimmy play on the swings at recess.. Because he's been dead for 5 years

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom? It having to eat its way out. Whats worse than it having to eat its way out? It comes back for seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

ADAM FANTUZZI SUCKS KIRANS BALL SACK

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I meant to state that I threatened to kill him unless he refused to state that I broke his knees (and broke his wrists, I forgot to mention that too, such misery... ...Give a real man a chance here, its not every day I have to kill my mother... But you still wont hear me whining about it, asked my wife if she forgave me if I spent the rest of the day smirking, after all my mother "had visions" where my wife was Satan, which is fun, since I was also Satan the day I was born... Because my name is Nero... A NAME SHE GAVE ME! Still, not very dignifying getting the shit beat out that old hag because she was on some blend of angel dust, and still not so fun killing her by biting half her neck off... ...Literally not so fun, kinda fun? You bet, tasted disgusting, watching her choke to death was...Lets just say I have shared enough joy with you for one day.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you confuse a blonde? Go up to her and say, "The bookbag coffeepotted the ice cream wedding! Is it gosling for you to rectify this pane of glass and oceans? I won't be able to berry a giant squid before the cows arrive."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops