What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

What is Rebecca Blacks favorite resurant? T.G.I Fridays...

What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

so theres a plane, inside the plane are 500 solid bricks one falls out, how many are left? 499 What are the three steps to putting an elephant into a refrigirator? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge. What are the four steps to putting a dear in the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer and then shut the fridge. It's Simba's birthday, what animal isn't there? The deer. its still in the fridge. a lady is walking across a street, she suddenly falls to the ground why? Because the brick hit her in the face. (:

Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken saw some potential food across the street.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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