John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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A guy walked into a bar, ouch.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

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What is worse than a person eating cereal? A black person eating white children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

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What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

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What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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What do you call a Black Man in the ocean? A scuba diver

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

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Roses are red Violets are red My lawn is red My fences are red It appears my garden is on fire.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops