What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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How are Lamborghinis and piles of dead babies alike? I don't have either in my garage. Except for the pile of dead babies.

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Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

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What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

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What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

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Why did the mexican jump over the fence? It was a shortcut.

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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How do u keep annoying children off your front lawn? Molest Them.

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

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What's funnier than 1 anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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