ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

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Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

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Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

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What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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Why was the family sad? Their house burnt down.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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