Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

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How did the plumber fix the leaky faucet? Trick question. The plumber is actually an iguana.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

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Know knock Who's there The fat lady off her medicine ball Call 000

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Yo mama so ugly that she often has trouble being attractive towards people of the opposite gender

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What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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What do you call a man who only eats fast food? Unhealthy.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

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Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops