Why did the little girl drop her teddy bear? Because she was being sexually molested. Why did the little Jewish girl drop her teddy bear? Because gas came out of the shower-head.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the Priest say to the kid walking home alone? Be safe.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

"Hey baby, how much?" "$2.99 each or 2 for $5.00, Steve." "Thanks Baby, I'll take 2."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Colnel Sanders cross the road? Colnel Ryan Sanders crossed the road to attack Taliban fighters who were endangering his military presence.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The young orphan boy had high hopes for this Christmas. When he woke up, he ran to the foot of the tree and saw a large box wrapped with seasonal wrapping paper. He looked at it to see that it was for someone else. The boy recieved nothing for Christmas and was later hit by a bus that had veered off of the road to avoid hitting a dog. The boy is now paralyzed and is extremely disappointed as to how his Christmas had unfolded.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's big, white, and kills you if it falls out of a tree. A Fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the aeroplane fall out of the sky? An ant jumped on it

thumb_up thumb_down -11

your moms so fat that she had to buy bigger cloths, her husband left her, she became a druggie and died alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog with no legs

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Guess what? Random shit. Why? Because almost nobody looks at the newest jokes to realize that 99.999% of jokes that just say random shit never get above the 0 mark.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why is 16 scared of 17? Because 17, 18, 19 *crickets*

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Gus's mom

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Gary: Hey Bill, wanna hear a joke? Bill: Yes Gary: Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops