A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Black people don't exist. Their skin is rather of a brown tone.

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

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What do the Jewish man, the Black man, and Mexican man all have in common? They all miraculously like cantalope.

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

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Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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What's black and white and red all over? A bloody fight between a black and a white man.

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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whats green and dont fit? a dead epileptic.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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