What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

Why did Bert go to the doctor? He had an appointment.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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