Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

Why can't Ray Charles read? Cuz he is blind You illiterate uneducated racist bastard trying to say it was because he was black.

whats white jizz

Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

kk

A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

if your in a wheelchair have no hair because of cancer and are being fed through a tube you should wait a couple of years before ending it. and wrinkles into the equation....... BANG

I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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