“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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A middle aged man goes to a psychic. She tells him that he has prostate cancer, and his wife has been cheating on him for the past 3 years.

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What was the motto of the Holocaust? Yolo.

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Yo mama is so fat, she just had a heart-attack.

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can you touch your toes? no

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

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find the o 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duh its up top

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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So i broke up with my girl, here her number... SIKE!! ITS THE WRONG NUMBAHHH!!!

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What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops