The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

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What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

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Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

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what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Sorry, I'm a poof.

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What do you call black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist bastard

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Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

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What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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You know those people that learned the true name of God, as God asked kindly... ...Well you know God can be nice sometimes but he actually COMMANDED they keep his name secret forever? They became the first people known as Jehova`s witnesses... JEHOVAH<<< SECRET NAME ANYBODY? So much for keeping his secret name guys! They claim that only a few thousand humans will ascend to heaven, in other words all of the JEHOVA`s witnesses... All two billions of them or something... For keeping his name (Cough JEHOVAH) secret. SUCCESS!

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What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

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A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

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Why did the black man purchase a gun? Because the man enjoys to go hunting in his spare time.

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Why did Madona rub shit on her vagina? Because she was horny.

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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you suck

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What? Chicken butt Why? Chicken thigh Who? Deez nuts

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whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

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Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

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Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? A holocaust in which all the Jews are raped by giant scorpions, and then killed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops