Three men went out for a night on the town, one had too much to drink and was forced to take a cab home.

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Ian's mind Elevator music

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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I had a quad when I was in high school, she was pretty but it was hard to get her out of the wheelchair.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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My son made a tree fort, it burned down.

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Q: why was the cat naked? A: its owner was drunk and thought he was shaving his own head.

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What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

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Why do so many people troll on the internet? Because Hitler was awesome!

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Have you heard the one about the monkey who jumped off the roof? Neither have I.

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look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

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It's porn, we all knew that, do you have something interesting to say?

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So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

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So a seal walks into a club.

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What floats in the toilet and looks like a log? A log.

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How do you make a car? You build it.

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Why is my grandpa always so grumpy? Because he has diabetes and life is very difficult for him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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