What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Is that your face or is your dog walking backwards.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

thumb_up thumb_down -38

what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Roses are grey Violets are grey Im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

There was a irishmen in his house. He was thirsty. so he drank some water

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Women drivers...

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What do you call a black man with a club? Tiger woods.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Q: What did the prostitute ask the officer? A: Where were you stationed? I have a lot of respect for our boys in the Middle East.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

thumb_up thumb_down -40

KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A black man provides has a normal day job and provides for his family while staying faithful to his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

what did the iPhone say to the other iPhone. we should not worry about that because iPhones are mute

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why did the man look up into the sky? carrot cake

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops