How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

Stevie Wonders said to his friend, "Have you seen my house?" "No" "Neither have I"

What colour is chocolate? Brown.

Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely white man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

This dog can only sniff marijuana.

Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

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Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroy his family and career.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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