Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

Chicken

Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

kk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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