Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

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A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

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Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

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So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

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IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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have you ever tried Ethiopian food? neither have they

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A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

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whats the difference between a chicken and a rooster. a rooster has a dick

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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whats white jizz

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Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

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ask me if i have a place to call home> 'have you a place to call home?' no im sad and lonely.

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Why did the cupcake walk into the bar? It can't it's a cupcake

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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Ask your friend: Will you remember me in a week? Will you remember me in a month? Will you remember me in a year? Knock Knock. Who's there? How did you forget me already?!?

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Duh!!!."

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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So a woman took her drivers test today Since she passed, and tomorrow is her 16th birthday, tomorrow she will have the legal privlage to get her license.

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what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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