What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

How do u keep annoying children off your front lawn? Molest Them.

Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

Why did the mexican jump over the fence? It was a shortcut.

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

I had 99 problems Solved them all

How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

Why Was 6 Afraid of 7? Because 7 was a Pedophile

YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

A group of black people are arrested for murder, what do you need? A better prison.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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