Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

kk

I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

why was six afraid of seven? because seven was a registered sex offender.

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

what did the blind man see? Nothing he felt the penis in his butt.

What did the apple say to the other apple? Nothing, apples are fruits and cannot talk

Why did the little girl cross the road??? To get away from the strange man

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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