A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

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What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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why did you poop because you are a poop

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Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

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How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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whats a joke

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

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How do you tell if someone likes butter? You ask them

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Why did the blond have a wierd look on her face? Because she was ugly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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