What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A cat playing laser tag.

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What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing???? she had down syndrome

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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in china a dog was being cooked on the grill he was seasoned ans eaten by a black man

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why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

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whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

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What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

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Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

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Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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kk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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