A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

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John's life hasn't been the same since committing suicide 13 years ago.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

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Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

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Joke

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Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents

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Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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What's better than winning a gold at the paralympic Walking

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Roses are red violets are blue tulips are purple/pink

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What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops