What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

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Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

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Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

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A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

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stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

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Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

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Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

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Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

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Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

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Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

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How does a man with no legs cross a road? In his wheelchair.

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

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Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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A blind man walks into a bar. He backs up, takes two steps to the right, and walks around the bar rubbing his forehead.

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Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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