How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb? None. They are blind and do not care if it is light or dark in their surroundings.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

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How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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Why couldn't he play piano? Because he is an untalented piece of shit.

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's Well it would depend on what type of cheese it actually is

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can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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Tim likes girls

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

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while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

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Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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