What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

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What's green and has wheels? Your mom.

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Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

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How did the baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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Terry has ebola

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What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

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What did one homo-sexual say to his four homo-sexual friends? Were One Direction!!

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Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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-Ask me if I'm a tree. +Are you a tree? -Yes. -Ask me if I'm an orange. +Are you an orange? -No, I'm a tree, were you listening me?

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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"Do you know the joke No me neither?" "No..." "Me neither..."

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Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

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A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

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There are two kinds of people: Those who have a life, and those who read anti-jokes

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WHAT THE BABIES?!

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Roses are red , Violets Are Blue , i Dont Like rhyming , TITTIES !!

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Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

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Q:Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? A:Because she had no arms.

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What's the worst thing about gang rape? Going last.

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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Two clowns are walking down the street The first says, "Whats better sunshine or rainbows?" The second says nothing, then casually picks up a brick and beats the other clown to death.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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