Why did the black guy have a nice sterio? He has a well paying job and decided to treat himself.

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Why did my toaster break? because it was made in china

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what is another way to say tree? A big stick with leaves

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

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Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

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what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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PSP its a nut you can play... Outside...

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Where does the girl with one leg work? Ihop

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Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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Why don't men want to marry virgins? They are wary of women who are inexperienced and who they may be sexually incompatible with.

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A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

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Knock knock Whose there? 4

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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