Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

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What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

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girls basketball

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why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? because its probably your bike

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A horse walks into a bar the barmam asks why the long face The horse replies he's suffering from depression after his family was killed in a car crash and he has now turned to alcohol to sort his sorrows

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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Why do women live longer? Because they work weaker.

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Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

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What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Roses are red violets are blue tulips are purple/pink

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops